So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize