I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
