I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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