And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
