Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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