I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
