Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
