I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize
