its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
