I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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