I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
