We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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