You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
