I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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