You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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