yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
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