What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Randomize
