im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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