you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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