you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
