I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
