hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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