just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
It's shark week go big or go home
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
