I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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