I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
