i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize