so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
