apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
