I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
