are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
