Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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