We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
It's official drugs can't kill me
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
