I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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