Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I wish you could order shots online.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
