At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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