do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
