I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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