just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
