Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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