We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Randomize
