Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
