do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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