SEEEEXXX PLEASE
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize