and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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