There is no way he is gay with that hair.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
