How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
