was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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