So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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