high people should be assigned attendants
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize