Yo dont text me then not text me
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
